My last post was, well...deep. Today's will be much lighter, thank goodness! I have emerged from the winter woes - 3 weeks good now and I'm so happy to be "up" again. Here are a few random events I want to remember.
Friday Night - Girls' Night Out
My 3rd grade teaching team decided it was time for a girls' night out together. I've come a long way in my comfort level with them - I'm beginning to chip away at the wall I've kept up between me and them due to my feelings of inadequacy next to them. We have enjoyed some laughs together in meetings and have done some fun things together. We met Friday night for dinner at Bambinis and enjoyed some laughs, shared some "enlightening" stories, and tried our hardest NOT to talk shop. Then we headed over to the movie theater to see "THE VOW." After passing the tremendously long lines waiting to get into the opening of Hunger Games, we entered a practically empty theater and enjoyed the show. All in all, it was a good night out and we are planning another one. There's something about letting your guards down and getting to know each other as people rather than just as teachers that makes it all easier.
Saturday - Temple and Lunch
Shan and I went to the temple Saturday morning and enjoyed a nice session. I had a chance to go over some of my ideas for my lesson on Sunday and get her insight and opinion. We then went to GH for a sandwich and proceeded to spend about 2 hours visiting. We haven't done that in a very long time and I really enjoyed our conversations. I have a way of pushing people away while I'm in my 'other self' and I don't think she really knows what to do with me, the poor girl. So it was nice to be in my 'right self' and visit like old times about all sorts of things. Her friendship matters to me and I am always grateful for her support.
Sunday - RS lesson
I had the privilege of teaching RS for the presidency on the conference talk "Doing the Right Thing at the Right Time, Without Delay." It was the shortest talk ever and so I had to incorporate other resources into it. I used the story of my family's friends - Gaye B and Terressa S - from our Texas days. My mom sent me a thing she put together based on letters back and forth sharing their experiences of visiting teaching-gone-right. I interwove some of the talk with a readers' theater style sharing of the 2 ladies' stories and then we talked afterwards about needs of sisters both around us at church as well as those we don't see. I shared some experiences of when I just moved into the ward 10 years ago and how people brought me in, as a lost single sister in a family ward. I think it went pretty well - I had several ladies come give me a hug afterwards, so if that's any indication... I enjoy teaching - I think I enjoy the preparation for it even more. I miss that.
Sunday - Road Trip
My mission comp-trainer, Connerly, and her family have been camping at Valley of Fire for a few days and so I had planned on going up Sunday afternoon to spend the evening with them. My ankle had been acting up, so I've been wearing the brace all day (right foot...driving foot). So, because Loralie and I needed to visit about her new assignment as my assistant for the 4th year hike, I asked if she wanted to go for a ride and enjoy some fresh air and dinner...if she would drive me! She was so willing and I was so grateful. We had the chance to talk about how she was chosen to step in because the other hike specialist was just put in as YW president in her ward and needed to be released (a whole other story) and share some ideas for the upcoming months of training with the girls. I'm excited - still optimistic that my foot will heal and I will be on the trails VERY soon. Anyway, we got to Valley of Fire and had a nice visit with Krystal and her family. They are such a sweet little family - she has 2 teen daughters and one 7 year old daughter. Her husband is such an even-tempered, helpful, supportive, funny guy and I think they just make the best couple ever. We enjoyed some deluxe Hawaiian haystacks and then the girls made cobbler and homemade ice cream by rolling the cans back and forth, singing songs and laughing the whole time. It really made me wonder if my life had turned out differently, if I would be a camping family like theirs, enjoying their time together in nature. I was so glad to have gotten to go out there and see her - we met 19 years ago this week in a small village in Guatemala and I've never been the same.
Work Update
I have struggled with being in the classroom and ALL that entails throughout this year. I am still not in love with it, but I think I've finally come to a point where I don't hate it every day. I know that sounds sad, but it's been a difficult personal change. I have learned that I can't do everything perfectly, or even close to it, and that it's OK. My kids are learning inspite of my reservations and my colleagues have been nothing but supportive. With thinking about next year, and doing this ALL over AGAIN, new positions are becoming available in the district as coaches and project facilitators. I have connections that could get me either type of position, but I've made the difficult decision that I am going to remain in the classroom at least 1-2 more years so that I can "perfect my craft" again. I don't feel that I would be an effective coach or mentor struggling the way I am this school year. I need to regain my confidence as a good, effective teacher again before I can go help/preach to others. I have to be able to walk the walk again and gain back my own credibility. Those close to me that I've told have been surprised, and one was shocked. But I believe that's the mature thing to do. I can learn to love it again - I just need to get over myself! I've enjoyed working with a team of teachers and our principal on school improvement planning goals, etc, as well as creating our budget for the next school year. I will always enjoy projects like those and am thankful for the opportunity to participate in those activities at the school level.
FIVE days until spring break...and I took today off to catch up! I can do this, because "I can do hard things." I've never looked forward to spring break like this year (well, maybe the time I went to Hawaii...but that was looking forward to it for a different reason!)
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